John (Jay) H. Remer Jr. is a North American consultant specializing in corporate etiquette and international protocol. He writes regularly about etiquette on his website www.etiquetteguy.com and has extensive cross-border board experience on which he reflects. “Sitting on a corporate board is different than a nonprofit board, but still formal,” says Remer. “You should dress appropriately, learn to adhere to Robert’s Rules of Order — and leave your egos at home.”

Remer says that a lot of people have ego problems that they don’t want to address. “There are definitely personality types that are not well-suited to serving on boards, as they are not team players. Leaders have to keep those personalities in check and refrain…from disrupting the focus of the team.” He also says there are three categories of board responsibilities that potential candidates should be aware of. You may be asked to:

• give or get money (i.e. engage in fundraising for the organization);
• give your time; or
• share expertise that stems from your own practical experience.

 

“In order to be an effective board member, you must fit at least two of those criteria,” says Remer. “And remember, misleading other people is very disrespectful and that is definitely bad etiquette.”

Board etiquette is a very important consideration and one that should be taken seriously by any board member. When you attend a board meeting, be fully in attendance — in body, mind, and spirit. That means no texting, checking email, or tweeting on your cell phone or laptop, or engaging in any other distracting activity unless it is specific to the effective functioning of the meeting and you are doing so for clarification on an issue or to get the word out quickly about something relevant to board business.

I was once on a board on which two directors brought their knitting needles and were knitting during the board meetings. It was very disruptive to the flow of the meetings as you could see two sets of knitting needles moving out of the corner of your eye and hear them clicking from time to time. Other directors and the staff must have experienced the same distracting effects, as the two directors were quickly asked to refrain from knitting at the board table.

This comment was made not to belittle the efforts of the directors, as both are great individuals and worked hard on behalf of the organization, but I do agree that when directors are sitting at the board table, their complete attention should be on board business and not partially diverted to a non-essential pastime.

By engaging in an activity that takes your attention away from board business during meetings, you are sending a message that says one of the following things:

• I am so smart that I don’t need to fully concentrate on what is being said.
• I’m not really interested in what you are saying.
• I really don’t want to be here.
• Other things are more important to me than being on this board.

 

Are these messages that you want to give to your fellow board members or the staff of the organization?

As an effective director you first must be true to yourself, as only you can accurately assess your own qualifications and only you can stand up to the commitment you will make as a board member. You then must be true to others and do your very best to meet any expectations.

Excerpted from Before You Say Yes by Doreen Pendgracs. Copyright © Doreen Pendgracs, 2010. All rights reserved. http://www.dundurn.com/books/you_say_yes

Doreen Pendgracs is a freelance writer and author based in Matlock, MB. She is the author of Before You Say Yes… a guide to help nonprofit board directors be more effective in their volunteer roles. The book is published by Dundurn Press and available online and in bookstores across the country.